Things you’re missing…

Your family. Especially the grandkids. Ace, Kane, and Lucy sure are missing out on such a wonderful person. Harper, Paytone, Leah, Quinn….all getting so big. And sadly you were not around to see Bennett.
Going down the shore
Driving around Delco….and Philly…and Jerzee
A Wawa pretzel and a cold Pepsi
Getting the Folcroft Pizza Special
Your Chinese food from Hong Kong…and years back Seven Stars. Paying extra 2.00 for extra shrimp.
Having your own car….and it being paid off.
Shooting the shit with your sister at her house….that I think you loved being at.
Prepping for the summer with all your paper products and tastykakes.
The friends you worked with in just about every A&P or Super Fresh and even ACME in the tri-state area. I know they miss you.
A meal with one of your kids.
A good beer…especially from Newport.
Driving around the shore and looking at houses…longing for your own place….that you definitely deserved.
Talking on the phone to any of us.
Talking to your neighbors.
Tending to your yard and the steps.
Putting up decorations for the holidays.
Putting stuff out on the steps.
Fresh lunch meat. Fresh poultry. Fresh anything…that you could turn into a wonderful meal.
Having us all at the dinner table talking about life and our days.
Telling us not to worry about….work, relationships, bad news, etc.
Telling us to leave a bad situation that we were in.
Your girlfriends you grew up with. It pains me to know that you lost connections with them over the years. I know it hurt you so much.
Having a good breakfast with one of us.
Doing things with the kids. Man. I wish we did so much more. Even simple stuff. You did so much, but I know how you just wanted to be out with us and around good people.
Staying up at Lisa’s house.
Coming down to Manayunk and enjoying the little things about this part of the city that I’ve lived.
Stopping by Bia’s any time to see her, Terry and Lucy.
Calling Kane your best friend.
Sending me cards on the holidays…or birthday.
Taking me out for my birthday and buying me a little something. As I’m sure you did for everyone.
Offering to help anyone and everyone and never complaining about it.
Your time with Heather and her family.
Your time with members of our family who have kids that were growing up…
Not seeing Malin graduate and go off to the Navy.
Hamming it up with “Big H” and how you guys just loved spending time together doing stupid stuff. Hearing her talk about the same things over and over.
Saying hi to Pop….and enjoying that relationship with someone your own father’s age…and appreciating his old school demeanor.
Little parties. Be it family or friends or whatever. You always loved making sure that there was everything that was needed.
The pool at the Y with the kids.
Seashells on the beach.
Sunsetting and a quick summer storm (as it is raining now).
Your bike down Chrissy’s. Chrissy’s place.
The Can and The Biscuit. I just couldn’t make it to the trailer this summer. It is hard for me.
Being invited to weddings, showers, and parties. I know you tried to attend as much as you could. I am sad you couldn’t attend as much as you wanted.
Having your own money and doing the right things with it. I can only imagine what you would’ve done for yourself and so many with all the money you were saving. You would’ve done so much good.
Telling me to move on and get another job.
Hearing our voices.
Listening to your favorite songs or sports radio…Mikey Miss and Rob.
Getting excited for fall…and baseball winding down and football gearing up.
While you liked sports, I wonder if all that wash made it worth it.
I know you missed working. It was an outlet for you. A place you had control. A place that you didn’t have the worries you dealt with. Well, the good places you liked any way.
I know you’re not missing taking the bus to work….still a terrible memory.
A good Reuben sandwich from whatever place we may have gone to.

I will try and think of some more. I can only hope our lives get better from all of this. I still don’t get it. We miss you so very much. It’s like there is a person that should be walking around at gatherings and she’s not there. When I get mad at something, I really think about how trivial and worthless it is and how the last year has been so monumentally challenging and I look back at that small issue and laugh and say, “you actually think that’s difficult to deal with?” Here, try this on for size. People complain about the smallest and most insignificant things and then some people don’t even realize the impact of human tragedy cause they’re so fixated on the mirror or looking good to their public, it’s funny. It’s just so much better to appreciate people and not things.


Nanny says hi. She always says she misses you when I leave....


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