PattybytheSea

   

Mom, your special day is tomorrow. You were always surprised by anything we did for you. I laughed and got emotional a few times this week as tomorrow drew closer. At one point I was getting out of the shower and just turned the light off to sit there and remembered how many times you literally just tossed all the girls in the tub for one team bath. Saving the environment. hahahahhaa. I would just laugh at how much simple joy you got out of just doing simple stuff like that, laughing at everyone running around. While I dont remember it, the "baths" you gave me down at Nanny's on Saybrook. I stop and ask myself. Man. You were such a new mom and washing your newborn son in the sink at Nanny's and just laughing. I wish that I could've seen film of such an event. Especially knowning how much Nanny loved you and me and just those simple, free moments. The days that pass without you are never easy. I truly have sadness over other people who have since lost their mothers

I had these pictures saved here to write about Cantastic Island aka The Can but never did. A cold and rainy day here in Delco will help with that. I really have little desire to hop on laptop and learn. Haha. You are thought about so much. Stef sent us a great picture that I never saw that I will post some time. It’s things like that that I remember better times where tragedy was not present.  I know how much you loved that little trailer. I can still feel around with my hands to feel the tweed floor liner, the “pinees” that dropped from the skies and into the trailer, the countertop that mom mom was always leaning against and my two little sea fairing captains; clothed in their yellow and navy blue captains coats. I remember actually going there one time with an ex when I was 28-29 and man it was rocking and rolling the next morning. I don’t remember falling asleep but we woke up with back pain from sleeping on the front bed. Haha. Poor pop pop. Such an early riser and disheveled just

I joked with some of the girls you’d be saying that in February. You’d be saying “geeeeez….they’re runing right past St. Paddy’s day with all the Easter stuff. Oh how I wish you were here.     Just for some friendly advice and to lend your never-ending support when it was needed most. And a helping hand to those who desperately needed your help; including myself. It has been the longest of winters. Not much snow but lots of cold the last few months. I wanted to go down the shore for some salt air but it wasn’t in the cards. I think of how much free time you’d have as I would have to say by now you’d finally stop working but part of me thinks you’d be doing houses just to keep busy. My mind wanders among the belief you’d have definitely moved out of 988 by now. The neighborhood just ain’t what it was. Driving down Delmar Dr….just not as warm. I would’ve loved to have seen you and Lucy walking to school and back anf passing my apartment. A huge bag of moments you will miss and they will

I found this message from you but I can’t remember how you sent it. It made me happy and sad and then happy again. All you wanted was your family, the beach and laughs and love. All things that are for the most part free. You are truly truly missed Mom. 

We had a nice Thanksgiving at Uncle Jimmy's. While everyone couldn't be there, so many were. I was so happy that Nan got a chance to be with all of us; especially Pop. I had talked to Pop about getting Nanny out of there for the holiday, but also didn't want to impede on anything anyone else had planned. I can only imagine how much you would be up there visiting her. I imagine you would have finally quit working....after so many years of backbreaking work....you could just have some time to yourself...and you definitely would be there for Nanny. I know, like helping others, it would've just given you more purpose to "get up and go". We had a great time and it was good to see everyone. It was actually a beautiful day. A perfect weather day for Thanksgiving. I was thinking of the pictures I had taken at Jimmy's only 6-7 years earlier. You were turning away, but I caught you with the lens. In some respects I would've loved to have had Thanksgiving with yo

 

I was talking to Theresa over messenger. She's meeting up with some of your old high school friends soon. We met up with Joe and Colleen and had dinner and had so many laughs and such a great time. It was just such a great time to see them, talk about old times and stories with you, Pop Pop, Mom Mom and Kathy. It's a cold, gray, day. I am in class, but I am not into it. Bia has her cheer team on the field outside my window, but can't really see them. I was talking to Theresa about all your decor for the fall. I actually said to her, "she may have liked fall more than summer, but she'd never say that..." Like mom mom with her ceramics, I would say I took it for granted all the great decorations you always put up. From the simple door stickiers for fall. I will never forget those little rubber sticky leaves you would put up on the door. They were so colorful. And cant even get into the steps. So much color, so much life. Always just filled with love, color, life

You popped in my head when I saw this older black woman in the aisle I was in at Acme. She was so petite and cute and I could see she not only had a list, but it was on some fancy note paper with some type of picture in the corner with the list lines printed. Granted I know you always just pulled out of a copy book or wrote it down on the back of a receipt, atm receipt, marlboro box, cereal box, etc. Many times with the beautiful weather we've been having after some terrible rain, it is easy to be grateful of all the time we had. When hard times come, I have a quick, "can I get through this?" and most of the time it's a resounding yes. I think of the times when you went through some rough patches, questioned things, wanted to run, but were always there for your kids, and I think about the present and if something bothers me, is it really something that bothers me or is it something I can just get past and move on. The old, tomorrow is a new day seems to hold true. The