Christmas Lights
Ok. Dad did a great job. We all had full bellies. We blew out two cakes. I went into my old room, now your room. I told you I missed you, I touched your box of ashes. I reflected for seconds. I looked at the shells on the bed spread. I thought about the beach. I thought about your hugs. Laughs. I was visiting Malin, Beth, Aunt Bootsie…turned out to be a great time with Kathy and all the Fehrle girls getting all of Mal’s old dolls. I left, sun down, passing the Erin. The last place I was physically with you. This is super hard to type without crying…so I am crying. I slowly drove in, then I replayed that day. We walked out from a great meal. You went to your car and got the bag from Rally House. Tissue paper exploding. Always same comment. “It’s just a little something….” I was so happy to get that Sixers shirt and Eagles hoody. Perfect. The type of hug I gave you that day. I could’ve cracked your spine. I picked you up off that ground as if, as if, as if…..it was….our last hug. From m