A Christmas Wish

If I could take away all the things I've ever received for Christmas to give me one gift for the rest of my life, I would just wish to spend time with you.....the you I remember. Today is hard. It is really hard to even move or be out and not think about you. We saw you yesterday. You opened your eyes. You even gave us a little smile. I know you're in there somewhere.....I think about you swimming in the ocean....trying to get back to the safety of the shore....with your kids...your grandkids...your sisters and brothers....your dad...your mom....your friends...I think of you seeing all of us waiting for you to come to shore....we see you out in the water.....just in one spot....Today and tomorrow will be hard without you....I truly feel like more than any other time.....Christmas and summertime are your times. They are you. I just can't make sense of it. I really can't. I came home last night and the light in my hallway was lit. A light that I've never once seen light up....was on. I just stood there and looked at it. It was a sign....a metaphor.....a dim light in that dark hallway.....to me....your light is still on....albeit dim....it is still there. We all miss you Mom. I told you yesterday you have nothing to be sad or sorry about. Nothing at all. I will go see you later. I've been out, getting gifts, trying to have some sense of normalcy.....it is not easy. I keep hoping for that one call....the call you always made to me around the holidays.....Happy Thanksgiving Bobby....Merry Christmas Bobby......that's all I want for Christmas....Miss you Mom. We all miss you so much. Bobby


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